7 Steps To Stress Management

Her eyes had deep, dark circles. She told me, "Ithey'd be sweating profusely and, within minutes,
haven't slept in weeks." I asked her why. She toldthey'd be out of breath. Does this sound like you
me that was because she "was all stressed out."under stress? Well the good news is you can trick
It was stress from her job and stress from heryour body into relaxing simply by using deep
kids. She was stressed out from driving an hourbreathing techniques. Focus on bringing your
each way to work and her boss was "driving herbreaths into the bottom of your stomach and
crazy." You could see that her stress was eatingthen push the air out completely. Breathe in slowly
her alive.for a count of four, hold your breath for five
People come to me all the time with similarcounts and then breathe out for a count of eight.
stories, of how stress is negatively affecting theirRepeat the 4-5 -8 breathing for a minute or so
lives. Stress is a killer. It has been linked toand your heart rate will slow, your sweaty palms
everything from headaches and digestivewill dry and things will start to feel more normal.
problems to reproductive ailments and even heartIf you would like more information about learning
disease. Stress has been shown to age us bothbreath control, see a qualified martial arts
mentally and physically and over time can kill us.instructor or yoga teacher. I teach Tai Chi and
When you are stressed your body releasesother breathing arts so if you're in San Diego give
stress hormones. These hormones can causeme a call. In addition to helping you with your
inflammation to your cardiovascular system and, ifbreathing, these types of activities can definitely
left unchecked, can affect your immune system,help you reduce your stress levels.
metabolism and other body systems. Bruce5. Cancel Stress Provoking Thoughts
McEwen, PhD head of the neuroendocrinology labDo you sometimes hear yourself saying, "If this
at Rockefeller University says, "Normally, in smallhappens, then that might happen and then we're
amounts, these substances help the body adapt,all up the creek!" Then, when you look back on it
but when they are chronically elevated theyall a few days later, you find you stressed
cause wear and tear."yourself for no reason? Sure, we all have. Most of
Let's look at the categories of stress. The firstthese types of things never happen. So why
type is acute or short term stress. This is knownwaste all your energy worrying needlessly?
as the flight or fight reaction where the brainNow this isn't saying don't think problems through.
produces chemicals that tell the body to speedGood planning means thinking about different
up, making it perform more effectively. This ispossibilities and then deciding on the best course
the type of stress you'll experience when anotherof action. But once you've made your decision,
car pulls out in front of you causing you to hitsee it through and trust that if another decision
your brakes suddenly. This is also known asneeds to be made you can make it.
distress.These types of thoughts give you F.E.A.R. (False
The positive form of acute stress is known asEvidence Appearing Real) If you find yourself
eustress. This is the stress you experience whenbeing tangled up in a stress knot by these types
you receive a promotion at work, get married orof thoughts you can gain control. See them for
buy a new house. These events are desirable but,what they are and make the decision to focus on
just like distress, eustress can be equally taxingwhat you want, rather on these types of fears.
on the body, and if added together with otherSince many of us have been programmed to
stressors can have negative results on our health.focus on the negative rather than the positive
The second type of stress is chronic or long-termyou might want to try meditation or hypnosis.
stress. Although it can be triggered by the sameThese types of activities can help you learn to
type of stressors as acute stress, this type ofcontrol your focus. If you are in the San Diego
stress can cause physical problems. Chronic stressarea, give me a call. Stress management is one of
occurs when we can't, or won't, let go of stress.the things that Total Mind Therapy can definitely
So how can we reduce our stress? Here arehelp with.
seven ways to cope with stress.6. Know What Sets You Off
1. Recognize Some Stress is GoodWe all have different trigger points. Presentations,
Some stress is good. The stress an athlete feelsinterviews, meetings, giving difficult feedback, tight
right before she bursts off the starting blocks.deadlines, tight budget, kids grades, traffic jams.
The stress you feel to make a deadline that willMy heart rate is racing just writing these down!
get you that promotion you've been wanting. TheMake your own list of stress trigger points or hot
energy you get when you see an old friend or aspots. Be specific. Is it only presentations to a
lover. This stress gives you that burst of energycertain audience that get you worked up? Is it
that enhances your performance at just the rightone project that causes more stress than
moment. Used wisely, this kind of stress will allowanother? Did you drink too much coffee?
you to push yourself that little bit harder when itKnowing what causes you stress is powerful
counts most. Make stress your friend!information, because once you know what the
2. Avoid Stress Infected Individualscause is, you can take action to make it less
Overly stressed people are infected with stressstressful. Do you need to learn some new skills?
germs and they spread them aroundDo you need extra resources? Do you need to
indiscriminately. Soon, before you know it, you aretalk to your kid's teacher? Do you need to switch
infected too!to decaf?
If you know that Charlie is always stressed at7. Take Care of Yourself
the first of the month when his reports are due,Lack of sleep, poor diet and no exercise wreaks
avoid him! If Sara is constantly complaining abouthavoc on our bodies and minds. If you only get
how busy she is and how her kids are driving herfive hours of sleep a night you double your
crazy, avoid her! Protect yourself by recognizingchance of dying of a heart attack. The same
stress in others and limiting your contact withgoes for eating fast food and forgetting to
them. Or if you've got the inclination, play stressexercise. Just like you car needs good fuel, you
doctor and teach them how to better manageneed good food for your body to run properly.
themselves.Just like your car needs regular maintenance, your
3. Model Calm Peoplebody needs exercise to maintain it in good
Modeling is a way of making yourself into theworking shape. If you really want to reduce your
type of person you want to be. So model calmstress take a good look at your lifestyle because
people, people who seem to naturally handlethese are things within your control.
stress well. When people around you are losingSo let's review quickly. First remember that some
their head, who keeps calm? What are they doingstress is good for you. Second, stay away from
differently? What is their attitude? What are theythe stress infected. Third, find calm people and
saying to others? What are they saying tomodel their behaviors. Fourth, learn to breathe,
themselves? Have they been trained in stressreally breathe. Fifth, focus on what you want.
management? What experiences have they had?Sixth, understand the things that cause you to
You might watch them or, better yet, sit themreact and, seventh, take care of yourself. There
down and talk with them. Ask them how theyyou are, seven easy ways to help you manage
cope with the things that seem to stressstress.
everyone else out. Learn from the best andThe bad news is that stress is always among us.
model what they do.The good news is you now have some easy
4. Breath, Really Breathemethods to cope with it. You can find inner peace.
As a martial arts instructor I can assure you, youYou just have to recognize what blocks its way
can't stay calm unless you control your breathing.and then work on removing those blocks, or if
When new students would start to spar (fight in ayou want a fool proof method, you could move
very controlled manner) they would inevitably holdto a mountain cave or a deserted island. The
their breath and soon their faces would be red,choice is always yours.