| Do you know why you are getting married? | | | | as being lonely. Loneliness is feeling, a lack of |
| If you hear yourself saying that you do not know | | | | companionship. How wonderful that someone |
| why you are getting married, then it is not | | | | comes into your life and you think that this |
| advised to proceed until making this life | | | | means you will never be lonely again. |
| commitment makes sense to you. That may | | | | Unfortunately few marriages would fit into that |
| sound very basic but it is surprising how many | | | | description. Partners often have different interests |
| people get caught up in someone else's dream. If | | | | that take them in different directions. Reality is |
| this is you then take some time and really look at | | | | that you end up being alone nearly as often as |
| what future you want to be moving towards. | | | | you were before marriage. |
| Who comes first partner or mates? | | | | Take up an interest that involves meeting with |
| One factor in the decision to marry that one | | | | other people regularly. Your partner might like to |
| special person in your life, is because you want to | | | | join you. Even if your partner chooses to pursue |
| spend every moment with them. Is your partner | | | | a different interest you will not be lonely. The fun |
| spending more time being supportive of their | | | | of a new interest is the learning and doing. No one |
| mates than with you? Do not expect this | | | | expects you to already know all the ins and out |
| behaviour will change after marriage. Getting | | | | of a new interest. Start looking today. |
| married is a commitment to put your partner first | | | | Is your partner verbally abusive? |
| before all else. Yes, even if it means sacrificing | | | | Verbal abusive comes in many forms. It can be |
| computer game practice time. | | | | subtle such as comments undermining your self |
| Children, yes or no? | | | | esteem. The abuse may take the form of blatant |
| The desire to have children is a fundamental one. | | | | hostility. Blaming you for everything in their life. |
| If one partner feels very strongly about having | | | | Either one is not a preferred method of |
| and raising children. The other partner is very | | | | communication. Each is demeaning and controlling. |
| plainly spoken about not wanting children. This is a | | | | Marriage is about equal partnership. Cherishing and |
| deal breaker. Each individual is entitled to choose | | | | honouring each other. Encouraging our partner to |
| which road in life they want to go down. | | | | be their best and so enjoy life to its fullest. |
| Some people mistakenly think everything will be | | | | My family want to see me married soon |
| alright after they get married and that they will | | | | Finding a partner and getting married and settling |
| persuade their partner to change their mind. | | | | down may be your family's dream for you. Is it |
| Getting married is not a magic wand. The topic of | | | | your dream? If this is not a priority for you then |
| children is a serious one and should be discussed | | | | you need to let your family know. If you enter a |
| before a decision to marry is taken. If one | | | | marriage resentful this will grow worse very |
| partner is unable to conceive children and knows | | | | quickly. Clarify the misunderstanding now before |
| this. Then this sensitive matter needs to be | | | | you or anyone else gets hurt. |
| discussed. This does not mean that they are not | | | | They are the only one for me |
| partner material. Rather it allows time for their | | | | It is wonderful to have met someone special |
| partner to wrap their head around the information | | | | when you both were at school. However, it is |
| and make an informed choice. | | | | worth taking the time to separate and experience |
| Physical violence against anyone | | | | the world at large for 12 months. This allows both |
| If your partner has displayed physical violence | | | | parties to get some perspective in a broader |
| towards any other person then this must give | | | | sense of their relationship. If you do not know |
| you pause for thought before taking them on as | | | | what else is out there, how can you know that |
| a life partner. It may be only a matter of time | | | | this is really what you want to commit to. An |
| before you become the target of the violence. | | | | informed choice is a lot more solid then a decision |
| Being lonely | | | | based on excitement. |
| Are you alone a lot? Being alone is not the same | | | | |