| Christiane Northrup wrote one of my favorite | | | | life is way more important to most people's sense |
| books, Women's Bodies, Women's Wisdom. In the | | | | of personal fulfillment than achieving some lofty |
| early years of my practice as a nurse-midwife, I | | | | goals like winning the Pulitzer. How do you have a |
| referred to that book more than any other. And I | | | | satisfying daily life? Look for things to appreciate. |
| now feel that her more recent book The Wisdom | | | | They can be small things like the way the light |
| of Menopause promises to be as oft-cited and | | | | plays on the leaves, or the way your cat purrs |
| referred to in the coming years. | | | | when you rub that special spot, but when you get |
| In The Wisdom of Menopause, Northrup writes, | | | | in the habit of looking for things that please you, |
| "At midlife more than any other time we have a | | | | you will find them. If in a day you find more |
| renewed opportunity to reinvent ourselves and | | | | things to appreciate than to find fault with, you will |
| fuel our lives from spirit." | | | | feel happy and satisfied by the end of it. String |
| Like her, I believe that midlife can inspire some | | | | together many similar days and you will have had |
| huge spiritual awakenings. For that reason, I've | | | | a happy and satisfying life. |
| drawn on Northrup's book-and from another | | | | 5. Decline Opportunities to Undermine Yourself. |
| instant classic, Stephen Cope's Yoga and the | | | | There is always a way to meet someone else's |
| Quest for the True Self-to put together the | | | | needs without sacrificing your own. I often get |
| following list of ways to foster a spiritual | | | | questions from my coaching clients about how to |
| awakening in middle age. | | | | achieve this. It can be challenging, but it is possible |
| Six Steps for Giving Birth to a Mid-Life You Love: | | | | to be true to yourself and your priorities and at |
| | | | the same time stay connected and be kind to |
| 1. Begin a Daily Physical Practice. Over centuries, | | | | those around you. When you speak from a place |
| yogis discovered this truth: we begin to know | | | | of alignment with your priorities you will most |
| reality through the body. We cannot transcend it. | | | | likely meet with acceptance and support from the |
| We can learn to listen to its messages, not ignore | | | | people in your life (try it and you'll see). But if you |
| them. Heart-thumping work-outs are a great form | | | | don't, it will be easier for you to let those |
| of cardiovascular exercise and stress release, but | | | | relationships go-or you may be surprised to see |
| the daily physical practice I'm asking you to adopt | | | | them simply fall away. This has been my |
| is a quieter, more meditative form: you could | | | | experience and the experience of many of my |
| begin a yoga practice, learn tai chi or simply get | | | | clients. So be clear about your priorities. Embrace |
| outside for a 15-minute walk every day. | | | | mid-life as a time to be comfortable with asking |
| 2. Honor Your Body's Messages. Our culture does | | | | for what you need to live your best life. |
| a pretty good job of teaching us to ignore our | | | | 6. Follow Your Bliss. There really has never been |
| body's cues-from hunger to using the bathroom. | | | | any better advice than Joseph Campbell's "Follow |
| We learn very early to control our bodies as a | | | | your bliss." My clients are often stymied when I |
| strategy for getting along in life. We learn to deny | | | | ask them what they really want. They have |
| the body's needs rather than learning how to | | | | deferred their true desires for so long that they |
| respond to them in a caring way. But one sure | | | | are almost unaware that they have any. But |
| sign of wisdom is an ability to pay attention to | | | | given proper encouragement, a long list is usually |
| things that others ignore. In mid-life, developing | | | | revealed quickly. And the benefits to exploring |
| this ability with respect to our bodies allows us to | | | | your true desires are profound. As Stephen Cope |
| appreciate that they are capable of sending us | | | | says, "True mastery can only be built upon the |
| profound and meaningful messages that when | | | | energy of real interest. This satisfying new |
| acted upon will improve our quality of life. So I'm | | | | connection with real interests may be |
| asking you to pay more attention to the signals | | | | accompanied by a sense of enhanced personal |
| your body sends. | | | | power-an experience of acting in alignment with |
| 3. Practice Exquisite Self-Care. As we begin to | | | | the deepest self." So I'm asking two questions: Do |
| hear our bodies' messages, another amazing | | | | you know what brings you joy? And is there |
| change takes place: we begin to have more | | | | something you'd truly love to do, but you're afraid |
| appreciation for them. We experience a new level | | | | to commit yourself to it because of fear of |
| of respect for our bodies and we want to keep | | | | failure? If you know what you want, I'd like you |
| them strong and healthy. For example, when we | | | | to start carving out more time to do it, even |
| compare the symptoms of fatigue with what we | | | | while you keep your "day" job. Connecting with |
| know our bodies can do when they're well-rested, | | | | your bliss for even small amounts of time will yield |
| it becomes easier to focus on getting adequate | | | | huge benefits. And if you don't know what brings |
| sleep. The same is true of eating well, getting | | | | you joy, start asking yourself every day, |
| exercise and making time to connect with loved | | | | preferably first thing in the morning "What do I |
| ones-as well as for quiet contemplation. We | | | | really, really, really want?" The answer will reveal |
| experience pleasure in caring for ourselves in this | | | | itself to you in time. |
| manner, and so I'm asking you to commit to | | | | I hope you will follow the above steps. If you can, |
| caring for yourself. | | | | you will be well on your way to embracing your |
| 4. Appreciate More. The key to a happy life-at | | | | own "Mid-Life Project" with the happy outcome of |
| any age-is to be happy. Having a satisfying daily | | | | giving birth to a life you truly love. |