How Do You Measure Pleasure?

Love, money, laughter, accomplishment, &having a good time with friends and family, the
fame are what we typically think of when wetime is based on lifting each other up. This type of
want something pleasurable in our lives. But dofun is at the expense of no one. Everyone can
they really bring us pleasure? Within all of thempartake and everyone can enjoy. All parties
lies a way to find temporary or permanentinvolved walk away feeling good about the time
pleasure. With friends, family, commercial televisionthey had and about themselves. It's not about
and movies all impressing upon you their views ofalcohol, drugs or negativity. It's about
the life you should want for yourself, you have tolight-heartedness, fond memories and imagination.
ask how do you really measure pleasure?This type of laughter is based in love. It is shared
How Do You Measure Pleasure In Love?consistently with quality friends and close family.
With love, many people measure pleasure throughWe lift ourselves up by lifting the spirits of
how much the other person does what they like,everyone we are with, and vise versa. It's
verses loving the core of who they are. Wheninnocent, it's fun, and it's memories are ever
you love someone because of what they do, youlasting.
are really trading what they like you to do forHow Do You Measure Pleasure Through
what you like them to do. So, when the personAccomplishment?
you love neatly fits into the role you outlined forWith accomplishment, do you want to be the
them in your mind, you have feelings of love forbest, or do you want to be the best you can be?
them. When they step out of that role becauseThere is a difference between the two. When
they've changed, different life circumstancesyou want to be the best, you have to compare
occur or they've decided not fulfill that roleyourself to others and judge how one is better or
anymore, we suddenly "fall out of love". This isworse than the other. Your focus is more on
conditional love.assessing what others do better than you so you
When you love a person for who they are as ancan figure out how to win. When you win, they
individual, you are on the road to lovinglose. Winning is of the highest value when being
unconditionally. Love is not based on what theythe best is the drive behind accomplishment.
do. Your love for them is always present becauseWhen someone else comes along that is better,
of who they are. You see the things that they doyou feel defeated, even if you've accomplished a
as expressions of who they are and not as theirgreat deal. Everything you do is compared to
identity. Love like this lasts a lifetime and cansomeone else, and your ranking against them
endure the toughest storms of a relationship. Andgives you your value.
when two people love each other in this way,When you measure pleasure by always seeking
they want to do things that the person they loveto be the best you can be, you never stop
would enjoy, because nothing gives them morelearning. It's not about how good you are
pleasure than to see the one they love genuinelycompared to someone else, but how much
happy. Unconditional love can create levels ofyou've grown within yourself compared to
intimacy that blow away anything in the moviesyesterday, last month or last year. Your focus is
or in romance novels. The difference is that it ison assessing your own pool of skills and talents,
only possible when you choose to measureimproving the ones that require development, and
pleasure in love through giving of yourself freelycontinuing to grow those that are highly tuned.
to the one you love.When someone else comes along that is better,
How Do You Measure Pleasure With Money?you watch and learn from them. Rather than
With money, many people want to find ways tocompeting, you ask questions. And if you find
show off their value, instead of doing things ofyourself the best at what you do through this
value. When people want to show value, they areprocess, you choose to help others to develop
demonstrating the quality or the quantity of theand become the best they can be as well. One of
stuff they have. They want to drive the mostthe greatest pleasures in life is teaching or
expensive luxury cars, wear the expensive namecoaching someone that goes on to surpass your
brand clothes, and wear jewelry that could be theskill level! For the person that strives to be the
down payment on a house. But why? After youbest they can be, it's a dream come true to help
get the thing you thought showed your value,another be the best they can be.
over time it becomes ordinary. If you bought it toHow Do You Measure Pleasure Through Fame?
show off to friends, and then another friend getsWith fame, is the number of people that know
something even more valuable, how do you feelyou important, or is it the number of people you
about what you bought? When you use yourinspire? When you derive a sense of worth
money to compare and compete with others,through how many people know you, think highly
there will always be someone that out shines you.of you or think you are cool, you are putting the
Therefore, you can never be truly happy withfoundation of your self esteem in other people's
what you have, and that happiness is alwayshands. Your reputation lives in other people's
temporary. You always need more and betterminds. If they choose to see you differently and
quality stuff to keep up with the value you wantyou are no longer popular, you no longer hold that
others to think of you as having.cool job title, or you otherwise lose the things
When people want to do things of value, theythat others valued you for, then your self-esteem
think bigger than just themselves. They mighttakes a beating. If you thought you were great
choose to invest in an idea that they love, and bywhen others thought you were great, how will
doing so create jobs and spend every day doingyou see yourself when others no longer see you
something they truly enjoy. They may look toas great?
help those that need it most through donations,When you measure pleasure by being an inspiring,
contributing to non-profit organizations, andit's more about doing the thing that you have a
starting community groups. They may save theirpassion for than about other people's thoughts
money to put their children through college, or toabout you. When you dedicate yourself to a
save for a comfortable retirement. Rather thanpurpose you have a passion for, you can't help
seeking to compare their perceived value withbut to inspire those around you. Without focusing
others, they seek to invest in ideas, helping peopleon it at all, other people look towards you as an
and worthy causes, or to find true enjoyment inexample for themselves to follow. Your attention
working now so they don't have to work later.to your passion helps them find and focus on their
Knowing that you've invested your money intopassion. It is not about being famous for fame's
ideas, people and in the future makes the thingsake to feed an ego. It's about doing the thing
you contributed to more valuable than the moneyyou love to do most in the world with all of the
itself can ever be.love, dedication and sincerity you can muster.
How Do You Measure Pleasure With Laughter?Those who inspire tend to shy away from fame
With laughter, many people think it's fun to laughand the belief that they are somehow better than
at other people and their problems, verses justothers. If fame finds these individuals, it does so
having a great time with friends and family.all on its own.
Sarcasm, laughing at someone else's misfortune,Measuring pleasure comes down to fear and love.
spreading rumors and feeling good becauseWhen you measure pleasure through fear, you
someone else failed are all based in negativity. Ifmust compare to and tear down others in order
these things happened to you, there is a goodto feel good yourself. Fear robs you of self
chance that you wouldn't find humor in them. It's-esteem and allows you to give the power of
because we view others as separate fromyourself over to others. When you measure
ourselves that we feel better when they dopleasure through love, you build people up while
poorly; in that moment we feel like we are betterbuilding up yourself. You fortify your self-esteem,
off than they are. In truth, putting down othermaking bulletproof, and inspire others because of
people for any reason is squarely based init. You aspire to ever increasing heights within
insecurity. We lift ourselves up by pushing othersyourself and have the courage to love
down when we engage in this type of "fun".unconditionally.
When you measure pleasure with laughter by