Interpersonal Kung Fu (How to Deal With People Who Suck)

So much of our lives we are around others underservice. The jerk egotist who tries to control all
a wide range of circumstances and in differentthe people around him or her or attack those
environments. Learning how to function socially iswhom they find threatening.
an important part of our development as humanWhen we encounter those who either are or
beings, but not everyone is playing fair or nice.seem intent to cause us harm, we have to
For better or worse we encounter a variety ofremain focused on the process which is unfolding,
people and personalities during our daily lives. Howdeal with ourselves and our emotional response,
we communicate and the outcomes of ourclaim and assert our universal right to be free
interactions can help us to grow- or shrink.from the manipulation of others, and then let go
Because we obviously want to grow, it'sof any outcome which we expect to receive. Just
important to start recognizing the things thatbe.
make us feel good and expand, and to alsoAssertiveness is a valuable skill and a state of
recognize the things that make us want to crawlbeing and doing. One of the first steps of
inside ourselves and get away.assertive behavior is learning to disagree and to
Communication always has a purpose, whethersay "no". Fortunately, assertiveness can be
the purpose is consciously known or unknown.learned and achieved by everyone. It all starts
Understanding the why's and the how's ofwith one single assertive behavior and builds from
communicating will deepen our understanding ofthat. The goal is to work on having a winning
our everyday reality.record. Just do it!
On a certain level, we are made to influence eachFocus and concentration enable us to remain
others' thoughts and actions. We're made to givestrong and composed during stressful events, in
and take instructions, guidance, and leadership. Wecharge of our actions and reactions. It empowers
can work excellently alone and work excellentlyus to be calm, to use the more advanced areas
as a team, as we are interconnected beings. Weof our brains, and to find a solution in the
are designed and inclined to listen to others aroundmoment. Meditation, exercise, and deep breathing
us. For instance if someone falls down and yellsare a just a few examples of things we can do
"help" we almost instinctively rush to give care toto improve concentration.
that person even without thinking about it.Self-love. We have to love ourselves more than
This is precisely the thing that leaves us widethe person who wishes to take advantage of us.
open to those who intend to control us or do usWe have to love what we stand for. We have to
harm. Examples of the usual suspects: the guy onlove life itself.
the street begging for money, but whose car isFinally we must know that there is no loss. We
parked down the road. The dishonest salesmanlive, we learn, we grow. We succeed.
who is selling a piece-of-junk product or rip-off