| It is a common trait that most people tend to | | | | That night after his cremation, I cried badly to |
| take things for granted. If you were to observe | | | | myself because of the "missing you" feeling that |
| some people around us, they seem to waste so | | | | was overwhelming. It was a good cry indeed! |
| much of what they possess in life. | | | | What has made me proud of my father is all |
| The old Chinese adage that says "No child is too | | | | about his principle and sacrifices. How I wished to |
| ugly and no parent is too poor," has the equivalent | | | | be able to turn back the pages of time to know |
| value to that of the English proverb, "blood is | | | | him more. |
| thicker than water." | | | | Whenever I have the opportunity to dwell on the |
| In my country Malaysia, very often we see the | | | | topic of the love of a father, I will always |
| despicable act of babies being abandoned, which | | | | elaborate it with the correlation to Kung-fu. |
| has soiled the human value. Such social malady is | | | | Let me share with you with what I mean with |
| unfathomable and the saddest of all, they are | | | | the following short story. |
| linked to mostly teenagers. | | | | During the era of the Chinese dynasty, people |
| I came into this world with my two other siblings. | | | | used Kung-fu abusively to proclaim their mastery |
| In the fifties, mothers were all housewives and | | | | and supremacy. Young males, often fatherless, |
| fathers were tasked to put bread on the table. | | | | sought refuge in Shaolin temple then. They were |
| Nurturing was on the mother's shoulder and we | | | | taught Kung-fu before returning to their villages to |
| were fed with old wives' tales and the fear of | | | | protect their village folks from marauding kung-fu |
| superstitions as the tools for discipline. | | | | rogues or to avenge the brutal slaughter of their |
| We had just enough to survive daily and we had | | | | families in the name of kung-fu supremacy. |
| no complaints because we were too young. As | | | | At early dawn, they had to go down the hill to |
| we grew in our teen-age years, I became the | | | | carry water from the stream back to the temple. |
| black sheep in the family because I would keep | | | | Each night when exhaustion set in, the monk |
| asking my father what I wanted. | | | | would secretly slice a thin layer off the bamboo |
| On occasions, he would keep quiet when I could | | | | sticks that were used as leverage to carry the |
| not accept his explanation. He would not raise his | | | | two buckets of water. |
| voice either and I guessed it would be better for | | | | Imagine the development of power in their arms |
| him to leave me alone. | | | | to compensate for the bamboo sticks that were |
| Whenever he wanted to go anywhere, he would | | | | deliberately weakened. |
| ask me to tag along. I obliged not because I was | | | | This is what I correlate to my father's intention |
| obedient but I could enjoy some refreshments | | | | by having me to tag along with him. The |
| and meals. I did not mind having to sit for hours | | | | availability of free drinks and meals to keep me |
| listening to him and his friends talked about | | | | away from my antics was the subtle intention. |
| anything under the sun. | | | | The silent motivation developed with time and the |
| Coming from a poor family himself and fatherless | | | | adaptability became vivid to qualify for the next |
| at nine, he grew up to be streetwise. The stories | | | | level. |
| about how suffering was like during the Japanese | | | | The Shaolin monks were vegetarians and the |
| occupation in Malaya were entertaining indeed. | | | | disciples were expected to follow suit. The |
| Despite being an illiterate, he knew how to mould | | | | enticement for meat to satisfy the craving led |
| me to what he had expected of me - to be a | | | | them to the river. They were allowed to eat fish |
| better person. | | | | if they could catch them with the bare hands. It |
| The most beautiful quality my father had was to | | | | was all about incredulity! |
| allow me to grow with his guidance and patience. | | | | This was what the disciples learnt through |
| He felt responsible for all his children because we | | | | patience and unending practices. By having to beat |
| did not ask to be born into the family where | | | | the odds triumphantly, they had earned the |
| luxury was an alienated word. | | | | impeccable speed and accuracy to grip a fish in |
| The day when I came to my senses was when I | | | | the hand. |
| heard his friend asking him about his health. He | | | | The relationship to my development in my |
| could not give up his indulgence in tobacco despite | | | | younger days had the similar quintessence. They |
| the warning from the doctor. He was inflicted with | | | | were all about learning to be patient, to focus in |
| chronic diseases and the kind doctor asked his | | | | what I had in mind and the most important was |
| friend to convey the message. The message was | | | | to scrutinize what was possible and surreal. |
| simple: If my father had no concern about his | | | | When the time was right for the disciples to |
| own health it would be his own funeral. However, | | | | return to their villages, the parting was emotional. |
| who would look after his children who were still | | | | The confidence they had was immense and to |
| dependents. | | | | face any foes was to keep a low profile. Knowing |
| He gave up tobacco! | | | | too well it was not easy to absorb their punches |
| Years passed by and we grew up and got | | | | the disciples chose to remain humble as well. |
| married. He was proud of us and proud to be a | | | | The critical reminder was just one word to use as |
| grandfather to all his grandchildren. | | | | yardstick even under intimidation. |
| When the hospital became his second home and | | | | PATIENCE! |
| seeing his degenerated self, I made a secret | | | | I find it difficult to practice patience because the |
| promise to myself that I wanted to be like my | | | | "waiting" itself is killing. I failed badly and the only |
| father to my children. | | | | consolation to myself is that in any endeavours, |
| Today, my siblings and I are all well-educated and | | | | the present world does not wait for anyone. |
| enjoy the little luxury we had missed in our | | | | Perhaps I have to learn to be a good angler first |
| younger days. My children have the comfort in | | | | to cultivate patience and harness it with discipline |
| life, tertiary education and independence. What | | | | before walking away from the modern day |
| can I ask for more? | | | | Shaolin Temple. |
| I remembered the day of my father's demise. I | | | | I am still so far from my father's kungfu skills of |
| was composed and put up a brave front except | | | | life. And in my world, I believe in wrestling, literally |
| for tears that welled up in my eyes occasionally. I | | | | speaking, because that will be the first thing to |
| kept reminding myself that I should be happy for | | | | what I will do. |
| his passing because he had suffered no more. | | | | |